Friday, November 12, 2010

Delays aren't just for airline flights....

I spent the first 3 days of the week in Dallas for a regional meeting. I was worn out by the time I got home. I took a red-eye flight Monday morning to get there and didn't land at home until after 10 pm. But, it was a good meeting and I did feel like I walked away a little bit smarter in terms of work.
However, while I was there, I got the call from the bank I had been waiting for....with the information I did not expect. It seems you can have all the money in the bank you need and great credit, etc, however if the appraiser doesn't think what you are going to do is worth anything, then none of it really matters. HUGE setback. I was so sick and anxious with worry all weekend. I DO NOT want to stay in our duplex any longer than necessary. If you know me, you also know I am not a patient person when it comes to stuff like this. I have such a huge "I'll just do it myself" attitude that when things happen that are beyond my control, I freak out. I'm a go-getter and idle time is my kryptonite! I was so ready to just give up on building our house and had decided we should just take advantage of the buyer's market.
But, by the time I landed on Wednesday, Plan B had been put into motion. Thank goodness for friends in low places, a determined husband, and more than one appraiser in the world! Looks like things have a way of working themselves out. Huge lesson for me!
We went to see Brandon Heath and Jars of Clay last night (will post pics/info later) and Brandon said something while he was introducing a song that really resonated with me. I have had so much anxiety and stress lately and it's all self-inflicted. My life couldn't be going any smoother really, yet I can find ways to worry abou tomorrow that completely rob today. I fear the what-if's to the point they paralyze me from being the best Mom, friend, wife, and worker that I can be.
But Brandon talked about how when he went to India, he felt the fear of the unknown set in when his plane landed and heard God speak to him and tell him, "If I can bring you to this place, know that I can get you through it." As soon as I heard that I realized I was completely doubting God to the point it was almost insulting. Where was my faith? My trust? What makes me think I can do it any better? Because I have a feeling if I try to do it my way, it won't be nearly as majestic as what he has in store.
So, I am trying (interpreted "reminding myself every 5 minutes") to remain faithful. I am just going to relax and KNOW that he is in control....not me! :)

1 comment:

Fowl Ideas said...

This is where the "next blog" button brought me.

Banks are a bit gun shy these days. Hang in'll find a way to get your home built.