The Art of Being Vague...or being Condemned.

I read an interesting article tonight and I feel it is most fitting in my life right now. The URL is http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=9351&TrackingID=516311&BannerID=544657&menuid=7>1=26000 and it's called "Dating and the Nosy Neighbors". I empathized a lot with the information in it. It talks about the busybodies, meddlers, and nosy people (such as the Bunco girls that gather together) that seem to find more fascination in someone's life than a soap opera. See, I know what people have said about me. You think your comments don't make it back, but they do. And deep down I think people want their comments to come back so that I will respond, explain, or tell them something. I honestly don't understand the fascination with my life. But I know how to react. Before, I would share and explain, hoping to help someone understand what was going on in my life so that they could understand. But now I realize that's exactly what they want. And I have learned, if you don't give them an explanation, they will create one on their own. These people don't care if their version is true or not. In fact, the more scandalous, the better.
But why do people do this? As the article says, they want to live vicariously through you. They are also the people that know what's best for everyone around them (yet ignore their own homes). They are also bored--drama keeps them going and if their life doesn't have it, surely someone else's does. I was pleased to see that my way of dealing with them is better than my old ways. The article suggests creating some distance--which I have done and am more happy than ever. And it's funny, for some reason the people I thought were close friends never bothered to check on me after that. Funny how when the pipeline of info stops, so does the friendship. Also, it talks about dodging them--it talks about how I don't owe them anything. That was my biggest mistake-I felt like I owed them an explanation. I wanted them to understand me. Now, I realize it wasn't me they were concerned about.
I went to church this morning for the first time in over a year. I even went to my old church, but only because it was held at the Arena--neutral ground. I found such irony in the message and the group of people sitting there. The message was on condemnation. It was ironic how he preached about how God takes away the condemnation with his son's death. But, that room full of people has the most condemning ones in the whole town. The irony comes from how as a church, this group of people should be the first ones to NOT judge, to be a friend, to reach out, to not make assumptions. Yet this very group has condemned me, judged me. And for things I have not done. At the end of the message, our Pastor prayed about how he was happy about, among other things, how the woman who only wants someone to love her unconditionally came today. That woman he prayed about was me.
You may not understand me, I refuse to help you do so at this point. But that doesn't mean I don't deserve to be loved. Unconditionally.

Ticks, Eggs, and Pies

The title sums up my Easter weekend...sounds like a crazy title to some weird reality show, but it was just the Easter weekend. Let me explain...I'll start with the pies. I signed up for desserts for our annual Easter gathering and I decided to give the pie thing a whirl. See, Richie is a coconut cream pie lover and there is a lady at his workplace that makes a mean coconut cream pie. Well, game on baby, because no woman is gonna make my man a pie better than I can. Or so I thought. I decided to take a trial run at the pie thing and made a chocolate pie Friday night. I made the filling from scratch and the meringue too. But no one told me you have to bake the pie crust before you make the pie! So, that's why we practice I guess--so we don't bring a bad pie to the party. However, I worked the kinks out and the coconut pie was all the rave today at dinner. I even decided to step up my game and made a strawberry pie as well which was really yummy too!
Now, to the eggs--that's a no brainer. It's Easter. There's gonna be eggs. However, we had a "big kid" egg hunt and me and my cousins hunted eggs. Looked more like a football game, but we had fun. I haven't ran that hard in a LONG time. I wore this ole body out hunting Easter eggs! :)
Which leads to the ticks. Yes, ticks. Even with an Easter in March that is cold, we still found ticks on us. In fact, between me, Richie, and the kids, we picked 9 ticks off of us! I was laying on the couch napping after we got home and I felt a bite on my neck. I reached back and pulled a tick off of me. Well, I hate ticks. They just creep me out (and for some reason your body feels like they are crawling all over you for hours after you find one)! Then, later I found one on my rear. Which that was probably off of the leaves that went down my drawers when I dove for an egg and fought with my cousin for it on the ground.
Well, it's bedtime. It's back to the routine in the morning since the kids are back in school!

A Series of Unfortunate Events

It all started Saturday morning with the nachos. I just wanted a snack during Weston's game--should've been a relatively uneventful time in my life--nachos. However, it wasn't. Let's just put it this way...I created more drama in the bleachers than the players did in the basketball game. We were running late for the basketball game and I really needed a bite to eat since it would be 4 pm before we got to the Amish Farm. I didn't really want to eat an entire meal, so I decided to grab some nachos at the snack bar. I got a big order of nachos with extra cheese and jalapenos--yummy! I sat down and went to take off my fleece jacket. As I started to slip off my jacket, the nachos decided to slip off my lap. Right on the coat of the lady in front of me. Upside down. Talk about embarrassing! The lady was so nice about it. From there, it was all down hill. I had a headache the rest of the day. 4 people didn't show for the Amish Farm dinner, but my parents still had to pay for it. Sunday's shower was a disaster (we'll leave it at that). And today, I get up, get ready for work, and head to the daycare to drop off the kids only to find out they are closed all week! So, I head home, and start making some lunch. The whole bottle of minced onion fell in the soup. I grabbed the tomato sauce can and opened it only to see evaporated milk. What a joy.
So, I think I need to go back to bed and stay there. For awhile. At least til this storm blows over.

Liar, Liar Pants on Fire!

First of all, I couldn't resist sharing some more pictures from our beautiful snow day last Friday! Kylie is such a ham and I must say the camera adores her!
Anyway, this has been a trying week. First, we have been trying to get Richie moved in and settled. He doesn't really have a ton of stuff, but it's just been busy trying to shuffle my stuff around, make room for his and get it put away. Even though we've been together for a year, we are adjusting to living together. I have my morning routine, he has his and we have to put them together. With all of that said, I must say that having him move in has been the highlight of the week. I love his company and I am just more at ease now that he's finally here.
Now, the more stressful stuff. Seems that Weston has caught the lying bug for some reason. It's not that he's telling these horrible lies, he is just having trouble telling the truth about common issues. So, it makes it hard to know what's true and what's not. I have tried to stress to him that telling lies will make people not trust him. I know he's stressed right now and I know he's craving attention, but I don't want the lying to get out of control.
Then, my friend is planning a wedding shower for me this weekend and bless her heart--she handmade the invitations and when she mailed them, since they were a little thick, they had to be hand-stamped at the post office instead of running them through the meter. Because of that, the post office delivered the invites (late) and charged everyone 17 cents! So, in order to get invited to my wedding shower, you have to pay 17 cents! She's also been really sick this week, so I know that's the last thing she needed to hear!
Add that to a bunch of little silly mishaps and you have a crazy week! But guess what? It's FRIDAY tomorrow!! YIPPEE!
Well, that's all for tonight--I am gonna head to bed (I hear the Wii so I am gonna get a little game of dodgeball in before bedtime!!).

Happy Birthday to me! I am 30!

30...Yuck. I feel fat. I have no energy. I actually crave naps. At least, I have the symptoms, otherwise I wouldn't really understand the meaning of turning 30. But hey, I have to admit, the day came and went without much hoopla. Which is good and bad. It's good because I didn't have my age rubbed in my face all day long...I was able to get through the day without the drama. Bad though because I was kind of hoping for a party, gathering, etc. Much like the ones I have thrown my Mom, brother, grandpa, ex-husband, boss...the list goes on. I guess when you are the party coordinator, you have to face the fact that your day won't get the same pomp and circumstance as you have given out. I was looking forward to the slideshow of embarrassing pictures, the surprise of family and friends gathered in my honor, the last night of fun and youth. I guess I was looking forward to these things because that's what it takes to swallow the truth--I am now officially old. I am now a part of the real adult crowd. Sure, you're an adult in your 20's, however there's still the sense of youthfulness to your looks, the ability to shop in the junior department, the hanging out with friends, etc that is acceptable in your semi-adult life. The 20's are the bridge, the time of transformation. 30 is just plain 30. You have to face the inevitable-things aren't in the same place (whether you have had kids or not), you can't eat everything on your plate and expect to look great in the sundress. 30 just sounds old...there's nothing sweet about it.
So, this 30 year OLD woman is heading off to bed. She NEEDS her beauty rest now (because these looks don't come natural anymore)!!

The Last Day of Youth!

Well, this is it. The hours are flying by--I am down to my final evening in my 20's. Tomorrow, I am 30. The dreaded day. I always joked that hell would freeze over before I turned 30. Hey, guess what? We got 9.5 inches of snow and our electricity went out for 36 hours and the house was a whopping 45 degrees inside this morning. So, I have to turn 30. Hell froze over! Oh well, I don't really have a choice I guess.
Like I said, we went without power from Friday morning until about 2 hours ago. It was a little stressful to say the least. Why? Because in the process, we are trying to move Richie to my house. His house had power, mine didn't. However, his house had nothing else! We had moved most of his food and started on the furniture. But, we got a lot accomplished today, so I guess you could say this is his first night in his new home!
The kids had a blast Friday with our snow day! We built a snowman and played in the snow. Even Andy (Richie's dog) had a blast! He was a hopping like a bunny through the snow--it was the CUTEST thing!
Well, I am tired, have a headache, and am hungry. Not to mention, I am going to enjoy my last few hours of youth!!

P.S. I finally added some pics of Kylie's competition in a post below....

Let it Snow Baby!!

We've got snow and lots of it! I can't believe it's 3 days until my birthday and we have a ton of snow!! The kids went out and played in it and had a blast.
In other news, Kylie got bit by a dog the other day. It was so frightening! She was scared to death, I was scared to death. It was the pit bull puppy across the street that bit her. The kids had went out to play in the first round of snow and I guess the dog thought that they needed someone to play with. However, he doesn't quite understand the boundaries of playing. He ended up ripping her jacket and bit the back of her thigh. But she's alright, I'm alright and we're going to let the dog live (for now)!!

MeMe's ER Visit

My grandmother went to the ER on Tuesday night with a high fever, vomiting, and passing out. She experienced dangerously low blood pressure drops and was admitted to ICU. She has a severe case of pneumonia and is still in ICU. It was very scary to learn about her illness. There was a point that they thought they could've lost her. I was so worried because I know she's been through a lot lately with her plastic surgery issue and now pneumonia. But I have to give her credit--she has remained positive and is getting out and attending kid's games, etc. I know it has to be SO hard, but she does it.

Extraction Excitement

Weston's two front teeth have been loose for awhile...a long while. In fact, one permanent tooth was already halfway in behind one of them. Problem was that the baby teeth didn't get enough push from the permanent teeth, so they were left hanging-literally. It was funny to see him smile--his front teeth almost stuck straight out! Well, last night my Mom came over and numbed his gums around the teeth and pulled both of them...at the same time! We couldn't believe they came out together. But we heard a loud POP and knew something had happened. So, needless to say, Weston is greatly relieved and the tooth fairy was able to finally visit. She left him $10. $5 for each tooth (she went ahead and paid him for pain and suffering!).
We are desperately trying to get Richie moved in, but it seems like such a slow process. It's just a domino effect--so much to do before we can get the next step done. But, no worries--I know it will happen soon!
Did you see our engagement announcement in the paper? We made Sunday's paper--what a cute couple!

Sick Man Walking

Poor Richie, he's just finished up day 4 of being sick. But I do think he's on the mend. This was his first day out of the bed--he even cleaned up the house!! (LOVE THAT!!) However, he has been miserable all weekend. Hopefully though, he'll feel better by the end of the week.
Well, I forgot to report that Kylie's cheerleading squad WON their competition a couple of weeks ago in OKC!!! I couldn't believe it! They did SO good! I will try and get a picture on here on my little cheerleader!
Angela and I had our 2nd "date"! It went great! I really like her...I think she's gonna be good for me and my kids.
I am SLOWLY getting my house in order....I cleaned out my laundry room last weekend (yes, a laundry room can get out of control)!! Last night I hung up about 50 pieces of clothing. I also got my guest bathroom scrubbed up a last weekend, too. I have decided to take it one room at a time. Hopefully by the time Richie moves in, the house will be ready (OK, fat chance, let's face it, I am running out of time!!).
On that note, I gotta get busy cleaning!!

The Meeting

Well, the dinner with Angela (Kyle's girlfriend) went great! We talked for over two hours and it felt like I was hanging out with an old friend. We have decided to get together again this week! She is very sweet and I think what helps the most is that we have so many things in common. I truly hope this is a great beginning to a long friendship. I know my kids are going to love hanging out with her and I think that since she understands what it feels like to be a Mom and to love your kids so much, she will respect my feelings and me. Anyway, it was a great meeting and I feel much better about the situation. We are going to get together by ourselves a few times so that we can get comfortable with each other. That way when we add Kyle, his family, and the kids to the mix, our relationship will be established.
I know it's a weird situation--at times, she and I had to stop and remind ourselves about the situation because we were having such a good time!
Well, I have started to leave Opie free in the house while I am at work. So far, it's working out. Cross your fingers it stays that way because I would like to have him out and about since Andy (Richie's dog) will soon be here.

My Blind Date

Tonight, I am meeting someone for dinner. We've never met face-to-face, but we've chatted on the phone briefly. It's my first time to meet someone like this. But it was my idea--I want to get to know this person because I have a feeling we could be spending a lot more time together. I want this person to even eventually meet my kids. But first I want to meet this person to see what I think. No, I am not cheating on Richie. It's not even a man. It's a woman. Some might call her the "other" woman. It's Kyle's girlfriend. I have had mixed emotions about this day for awhile. What will she think of me? What if she doesn't like me? What if my kids love her more than me one day? You name it, the thought has crossed my mind. I have looked forward to this day and dreaded this day all in the same breath. My kids could potentially have "another" Mom in their life and it scares me to death.
I have to say that our phone conversation the other night was so pleasant. She is a sweet woman, with a wonderful heart, who seems genuine. I told her I prayed about her. I told her I wanted God to bring a great woman to Kyle, but that I selfishly asked that she be someone that would understand the hardship I feel. She does. She has 3 kids of her own and she's experiencing the same thing with her children and ex-husband. She agreed to have dinner with me--just the two of us, so that we can get to know each other without everyone watching us. We want to talk and hang out by ourselves, so that when family is around, the awkwardness is gone. There won't be any insecurity.
Some people have shook their heads in disbelief at the thought of the two of us having dinner. Others think it's a great idea. We both think it's going to be a little difficult at first, but we are committed to starting this relationship off on the right foot. We want to work together, not be pitted against each other. If there's anything I learned in my last marriage, it's that family plays a big role in the happiness of your marriage. I also learned that first impressions are lasting impressions.
I have to say that so far I can't imagine anyone else I would rather have in my children's life. She seems to be a great woman who sincerely wants to do what's best for me, my kids, and Kyle. I hope that tonight is the start of a great relationship, a potential friendship, and the beginning of a great partnership in raising our kids.

Sick....once again!

No, this isn't a repeat of a previous post. Once again, I am sick! I spent yet another weekend on the couch, sick as a dog, complete with fever. I am SO tired of feeling bad--especially on my weekends! My house has been ruled a disaster area by the Governor because it's so bad. I desperately need a housekeeper--it seems I never get to the "deep cleaning" because there is so much picking up to do! I am so embarrassed by my house!
Enough of that--how about the Giants last night? Take that Tom Brady! Guess his Brazilian model should've taken note from Jessica Simpson and stayed home....wait, glad she came!
Kylie has her 2nd cheerleading competition this weekend. I think a lot of the family is going to be able to make it, too. She is so cute to watch perform! Richie is also getting promoted this weekend. I am SO proud of him and his accomplishments--he is truly deserving of his new position.

How to Deal

Well, we received some sad news today. Kyle's Papaw Sam passed away. It's the first time I have had to really tell the kids that someone has died. Sure, we have experienced death since they've been alive, but they've been to young to really understand. But today they understood. They are doing OK and they even want to go to the funeral which I will definitely make sure they attend. It's always hard when you lose someone close. Sometimes it's even harder to know what to do for someone when they lose a loved one. You don't want to say the wrong thing, yet you don't want to seem like you don't care. I think the best thing to do is to just listen. For once we aren't expected to have the right words. The person needs support. They need to know it's perfectly OK to cry. They need time. They need to know you care.

Metabolism Meltdown

Well, it finally happened...my brain told my body that I am gonna turn 30 in about 6 weeks. Nice job, brain....Because now my body decided that there is no need to work so hard and burn fat. It's like my body went into retirement....fat siesta. I don't know what it is, but 6 pounds later I am NOT liking it. Great and don't forget I have to have bikini body by April 9th or else I am gonna look like the hail-damaged whale that washed up on the beach instead of the blushing bride.
I wonder, do they make full body bathing suits? :)

You're Gonna Miss This

I heard a song on the radio the other day and it struck me. The lyrics instantly sent pictures flashing through my head....a rent house in Russellville--small, but perfect. It held everything I owned. It had spiders the size of Dallas, worms the length of the Rio Grande, but I couldn't ask for more. It was a home and to a 20 year old girl, it was everything I ever needed. Another picture hit me....cooking spaghetti O's on the stove (for me to eat), homework every night, a console TV in the living room, a couch out of my Grandma's house. I was happy as could be. But I was ready for more. Ready to graduate, get a real job, real house, real car, have kids. I wanted tomorrow. I forgot to enjoy today.
Another picture came after that. It was Weston's ultrasound picture. He was 20 weeks old in my tummy and looked similar to a dinosaur exhibit at the time. But he was mine--a baby in my belly. Then another picture--Weston at about 7 months old, and sick. It was during the worst ice storm to hit here. I remember the navy jogging suit he was wearing, the bottle of 1/2 water and 1/2 milk I was hoping desperately would stay down (he was throwing up constantly for a week). I remember sleeping in the guest bedroom with him that night scared to death to let him sleep by himself for fear he would choke if he got sick.
Another picture--Kylie in the hospital. Not the day she was born. But 5 days later. She was sick--they thought meningitis. I was scared that I had been given a blessing only to have to give it right back. I remember rocking her in the hospital room, with her IV in her foot, full of fear. Something a 24 year old girl shouldn't have to think about.
Then, it hits me. It's 2008. This girl has a Master's degree, lives in a modular, and those kids are 8 years and 5 years old. What happened? Where did the time go? And more importantly, what's on my mind. The same thing as it was back then....tomorrow. Never really giving much thought to today. Never realizing that I am in the perfect place. I have the opportunity to save money, I have a job that allows me time with my kids.
Why is it that we never really enjoy today...which used to be our tomorrow. It used to be the day we were waiting for. Now it's just a road block to the rest of our life. It should be our life. It's the only thing we have control over. Yesterday is gone. You can't have it back. Tomorrow is a full day away....it will get here inevitably. But today is already here--it's an unsculpted piece of time that you have the ability to mold into your own creation.
Here's those lyrics....what pictures go through your head?

Trace Adkins' "You're Gonna Miss This"

She was staring out the window of that SUV
Complaining, saying "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said "I'll make my own money and I'll make my own rules"
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says "Baby, just slow down"

Cause you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but ...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this"

Enjoy every day you are given...if not, YOU"RE GONNA MISS IT!!

Reading Machine

I am blown away by Kylie's reading ability! Last night, she sat down and asked me if she could read a story to me. I said yes, and she had me pick out a book. Then, she proceeded to read and did awesome. There were words like "everywhere", "kangaroo", etc and she read them with no hesitation! She's only in kindergarten! I was just amazed because 2 months ago, they started learning the sounds of letters and a few blends. Her progress is phenomenal! She is now in Accelerated Reading at a school--a program that has the kids read books and then test over them. The get so many points per correct test answer and prizes are given at certain point levels. She loves it and her Momma couldn't be more proud! Maybe she'll end up with an English degree like me! :)
I am feeling much better today! I am glad because you don't really have the ability to be sick on the job--it's non-stop go-go-go!
It looks like we may get some yucky weather tonight--but of course it'll be ice and junk that's not fun to play in--just dangerous to drive on! I can already hear sleet hitting the roof....

Ill-fated Weekend

I have some of the best intentions...and the worst results! I really wanted to get a lot accomplished this weekend--clean out the 5th bedroom, pick up the house, organize my office....the list goes on. Instead, I got sick. You know the throwing up, green feeling kind of sick. It was awful. I HATE feeling that way. But, I am hoping I have gotten it over with and can get on with my week. I have a busy week ahead of me, so I have to feel better!
Friday night Richie and I went to a going-away party of one of my dear friends, Amanda. She is leaving for Alabama in a couple of weeks for a new job and I am dearly going to miss her. She and I got our Master's degrees together and we experienced every Thursday evening with each other for nearly two years. She's been there through some family changes, job changes, moving, you name it. She is the most positive, uplifting person you will ever meet. She loves you for who you are--not who everyone wants you to be. The girl couldn't find a jealous bone in her body if she tried! I will dearly miss her, however I hope to go visit her while she's in Alabama. She only stays there for about 9 months and then she'll move to New Orleans permanently. So, good luck Amanda! You will be dearly missed!

I wanna talk about me!

I spent the day today bragging on myself. Yep, the whole day. Now before you start accusing me of being conceited and full of ME, you probably need the rest of the story. My new job requires us (the employee) to write our own performance reviews. I really like the idea! It's a ton of work, but compared to my last job, it's nice to be able to document your year's worth of accomplishments and discuss them with your supervisor. At my last job, I felt like my boss basically reflected on the last 2 months before the review and gave no consideration to accomplishments 10 months before that. Basically, you were better off to goof around the first 6 months and then work your way into superstar employee right before the review. In fact, I got totally robbed on my last review at my old job. I had some of my biggest accomplishments, but since they were in March and my review wasn't until the following February (nearly 11 months later), they were never noted.
So, this process is pretty cool! You basically file any emails that are sent to you bragging on your abilities, awards given to over the year, etc and write a review to turn in. Then you grade yourself in each of the categories. Your boss reviews it adds/subtracts and it's turned in from there!

The Dust Collector

I found this big, bulky machine in my office today...it had the words "elliptical machine" on it. No seriously, I FINALLY started working out again. I have to get rid of the jiggle before April! Richie does have 3 days in Mexico before we marry to change his mind ya know! :)
We have about 75% of the required paperwork ready for the wedding. We both at least have passports, so we will make it there at least!

Bedwetting Blues

Ok, don't read the title and think I have bedwetting issues! Miss Kylie does though. And I am frustrated by it--we wash PJ's, sheets, you name it, she wets it! So, I have been doing a little research. To my amazement, there are tons of causes beyond the "bladder hasn't developed yet" reason. So, we are on a test mission to determine if she has any of these issues. First stop, blood work--we were testing for Type 1 diabetes, thyroid issues, and kidney problems. Thankfully, she had none of these! Our next stop is the Ear, Nose, and Throat doctor. It seems that sleep apnea is a big cause of bedwetting in children. Some symptoms of this are snoring, irritability upon waking, and deep sleep. Kylie has all of these. So, we will see what the ENT says next month when we visit. The "fix" for this is to remove the tonsils and adenoids. If it'll help Kylie breathe better at night and not wet the bed, sign her up!

Where Did the Weekend Go?

Well, it's Sunday night and I am trying to figure out how I got here. See, I was supposed to get a weekend. The last thing I remember was Friday on an airplane heading home and now it's Sunday night and I am getting ready to head back to work! I still have a suitcase in my floor from my trip, a dirty house, and no groceries! I guess that's life though...it just goes faster and faster.
Obviously I don't have a lot to discuss from the weekend since I barely had time to enjoy it but it's good to be home.

Cult of Personality

Well, training is winding down....one more day (actually only 1/2 day left) and I am heading home. Today was pretty cool though. We did these personality profiles and the interesting part about them was that they are the perception of your peers. Most personality tests are ones that you answer questions and based on your answers you get lumped into a "type". I liked this profile, although you have to keep in mind the subjectivity aspect. What I mean is that it is only based on 5 people's responses and therefore if you asked another 5 people, you could get a different response. I tried to pick people from my past job and present job so that I could get a well-rounded perspective. I have a completely different role at my last job, so I wanted to see if that had any bearing or not.
Anyway, I came out as Expressive-Expressive....not surprising huh? :)
What that means is that I am people-focused, love to share my ideas and thoughts, and I reinforce others on the opinions and feelings they express. It also said I was creative in problem-solving and handling the concerns of my customers.
The people I picked were my current coworker that shares my territory, my new boss, a girl that was on my marketing team at my previous job, a girl that went on one of the marketing events I managed, and a friend at my last job that didn't have any direct business contact with me, but was able to provide that outside perspective since she worked in my department. The other aspect that the test graded was versatility. In this role, I was more on the versatile side, but had some lack of versatility show up. I agree with that--I don't think in every role we play that our versatility will be the same. I have a feeling the split was the different perspective from former and present coworkers.
It was pretty interesting...the most interesting aspect however was reading others and learning how to best communicate with the various social styles. I think that we all tend to try and interact with each other in a "blanket" format and then we feel frustrated when it doesn't give us a "blanket" result.
I also bought a new book on my trip called 4 Paws from Heaven. It's little devotionals centered around the writer's pet and creates a metaphor in how we as "masters" of our dogs share a similar role with our Master. I will try and share some of my favorite insights from the book on here.
Also, while I have been in Chicago, there has been more drama at home. Seems the neighbors want to be difficult and have left a letter on my metal building about driving on the back road. It's a little frustrating because I think their behavior is a result of fear--fear that my Dad is planning to develop his property, fear that a bunch of people are going to use the road, etc. But where the most frustration comes into play is that I have land and I have no easement. I just get sick of all the hype. I wish my parents would just deed my the driveway that I built or provide a written easement on it. I can't worry about stuff like that anymore--I need to be able to sell my land/building without issues.
Well, it's off to our "graduation" celebration...here's to Friday and no snow so I can come home!!

Chicago Chat

Well, I made it to Chicago! Hey, they don't call it the Windy City for nothing. I about blew away! But it's good to be back and reconnect with some old friends I made from Initial Sales Training. Tonight, we had a reception and they showed the BCS game on a movie screen. The only bad thing about training is that we are always busy. Sometimes it's nice to go back to the room and just read/watch TV. Oh well--good food and a nice hotel. Can't complain!

L-O-V-E

No one falls in love by choice,
it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance,
it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance,
it is by CHOICE.

Wow, short but powerful. I choose to be in love.

Boob Bashing

Ok, now that I know the results, I have to tell you about a little experience I had yesterday. I found a lump in my breast about 6 weeks ago and went to my gyno. Well, he was concerned and ordered an ultrasound and mammography. Yesterday was the big day. Let me tell ya, I never realized how flat they can get a boob...especially one that has been surgically enhanced! It was the weirdest experience of my life. Having my breast flattened onto a counter in front of me. I wasn't sure if I should laugh or cry. I mean I have heard about having a mammography, but never realized what "flattened" means! However, I can proudly say I am as healthy as a horse--just a couple of good-sized cysts. And I don't have to do that again for several years!
Well, about time to pack for another week in Chicago--except I am gonna freeze this time! I lucked out last April and had AWESOME weather, but this time I am sure it'll be a little colder! Oh well, we have a busy agenda, so we may never see the light of day! :)

It's 2008 BABY!

It's the first day of the New Year and I am NOT ready for 2008. I didn't get my to-do list accomplished at all. But hey, I did enjoy my time off and I am sure gonna miss sleeping in every morning! Hey, how about those Hogs? Oh yeah, they forgot to show up for the football game! That game was AWFUL! I am embarrassed.
I just realized that I didn't do a Christmas post--I skipped straight to the New Year. So, I guess I should back up and reflect on Christmas Day. Once again, it was an exciting morning--however I had to go drag the kids out of bed! But when they got up and saw all the great presents, they woke up very quickly. Weston loved his PS3 and Kylie was thrilled to get a dollhouse complete with the fixings! Plus, plenty of DS games wrapped up the present list. Kylie and Weston also got some cute new clothes (which thrilled Mom!). All in all, it was a great holiday. It was also my first year to host Christmas breakfast. My parents and grandparents came over and we had every breakfast food possible. So much that by lunch, we were too full to enjoy the Christmas meal. Speaking of lunch, we went to Richie's parents where the rest of his family had gathered. I got a new set of dishes--that serves 16--from them which thrilled me. I really wanted a new set of dishes!
I also got the COMPLETE MacGyver series on DVD!
Well, tomorrow is back to work. YUCK. I don't dread it too bad though. I have had plenty of time to rest and it's a short week anyway. Next week, I will be in Chicago all week for training, so if I can make it through 3 days, I'll be good.
Have a great week!

Here's to 2008!

Ok, it's the end of the year and it's time to look back on the year and examine signs of our time! I did this quiz in 2006 and I thought it would be kind of neat to start a tradition of answering the same questions. It is enlightening to look back at myself one year ago--to see what was important to me, to see what my goals were, my feelings. Then, to be able to paint the same picture now for myself next year.....

2007--What kind of year was it???

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?

This was a year of many beginnings and changes in my life....where do I start? Let's see I started a new job in a completely different field--pharmaceutical sales. I FINALLY moved out of the metal building and into a modular. I went to Guatemala....the list goes on and on!!


2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Last year's resolutions were to exercise on a consistent basis and to finish my Master's degree. I can proudly say I am a 2007 graduate! As for the exercising....well, I did great at a the beginning of the year (I even won the pool at work for the most body fat lost in 3 months! However, as the year passed, it just became hard to find time.
For next year--exercise is a MUST! I am going to Cancun in April and I don't want to hide behind icky clothes! I also want to get organized. And I want the 5th bedroom cleaned out--mega yard sale baby! I would like to convert that room into a game room for the family (because I want a Wii for my birthday...hint. hint.)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Well, "close" is a loose term. None of my immediate friends had babies, but several acquaintances did such as Kyle's sister and her best friend. However, I don't even know the babies, so I guess the answer would technically be no.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, not this year.

5. What countries did you visit?

I went to Guatemala--it was such a blast, yet such an eye-opening experience. I truly felt blessed to serve those people for a week. I definitely want to find time in my life for more mission trips. The experience and life lessons are immeasurable.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

Last year I said a house--and I got it (sort of)! I also said a toned body and confidence and I would have to say those two things again! I would also like to have peace and some free time. Hey, and a little more patience wouldn't hurt.

7. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Definitely September 16th...that's when Richie proposed to me. That was the first day of the rest of my life.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Graduating with my Master's....putting myself in an elite group that few ever achieve.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No major injuries, just learning to adjust with dealing with my jacked-up back now that I have a more active job that requires long drives and lifting.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I can't think of one specific thing, but I love my new curtains, bedspread, and other decor in my new house. And that PS3 is really entertaining the boys! I also love this new Mac computer....it's awesome!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

This one belongs to Kylie. She started kindergarten this year and I was SO nervous. She is quite the challenger and I was so afraid that she would have a tough time adjusting to big school. However, she has only gotten a handful of blue notes this year-mostly green! And she had a nearly two week straight green note stretch when Richie challenged her with money! Green for green! :)

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Gonna have to give this one to the parents. No more deals.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Debt. Clothes. New house decorations. Kiddos.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

My life with Richie--trying to relax and enjoying that period between engagement and the wedding....

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

Hey There Delilah...even though I HATE it! Any Daughtry songs were good song memories for 2007 though!

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
happier or sadder? thinner or fatter? richer or poorer?

I am much thinner first of all--nearly 13 pounds thinner! I feel richer--I have started a savings account and I am kicking some rear!! I am also happier!

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Relaxed. Read books. Cleaned my house (I know I sound weird).

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Less worrying.

20. How will you be spending New Year’s?

Gonna go visit Karla and Billy in Tulsa.

22. Did you fall in love in 2007?

Yes, I did. I love you Richie.

23. What was your favorite TV program?

Desperate Housewives. Big Bang Theory. Rules of Engagement.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I don't "hate" anyone--but there are people I don't care for.

26. What was the best book you read?

The Golden Rule. My Karen Kingbury books--always good ones!

27. What was your greatest musical (re)discovery?

Daughtry--love them!

29. What did you want and not get?

To sell my car. My house cleaned. And I didn't get the Girls Next Door Seasons on DVD... :(

30. What was your favorite film of this year?

Alvin and the Chipmunks!! :)

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Gosh, I can't remember exactly what I did. That really means I am getting old! Oh yeah, I remember--Reno 911. Ok, next year I pick the movie!! But it was definitely my last birthday. I am NOT turning 30 next year!!

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Getting a house, being debt free. Being organized!!!

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Teal/Chocolate. Learning to buy/wear flashy shoes instead of my staple black/brown heels!

34. What kept you sane?

This blog--the ability to write! :)

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Katie Holmes--watching her morph into Mrs. Cruise right before our eyes. She sure doesn't look like she did a few years ago.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

The death of Bhutto a couple of days ago--tragic, unfortunate, unnecessary. She was a great woman with such a big heart and a desire to serve her people. Her country will greatly miss her.

37. Who did you miss?

No one really--I have everyone I need.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

Besides Richie, I have developed a great friendship with Amy. We didn't actually just meet, but we have become great friends.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007:

Life has no guarantees--you can plan and dream, but in the end, you never know the outcome.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

I don't know about you but I was put here to live and love
So, what if I don't do it like everybody else does
I'm out on the edge, I'm too willing to risk
Every bone, every breath, they say, all I am is a crazy dream
Like it's a bad thing.

--Gary Alan's "Like It's a Bad Thing"

Happy 2008 everybody! May 2008 find you achieving your goals, living your dreams, and loving life!

Muddy Christmas to You!

First of all, yesterday was the two year birthday of my blog--Happy Birthday, Blog! Before we talk about today, let's talk about yesterday's excitement.
The kids spent the weekend with Kyle and when he brought them home last night, we were using the front door instead of the back door (for reference, the back door broke the night before when it was so windy, therefore it's out of order until we can get it fixed), so he proceeded to pull up to that door to let the kids out and bring in their stuff. Well, he had turned around and was talking to them and wasn't paying attention and pulled onto the water line ditch...that's not quite set yet. That big 'ole diesel truck is front heavy and as soon as it hit the ditch, the front two tires sank about halfway. Well, we got the kids out and situated and he when he got ready to leave, he tried to back out and quickly found out the tires were just going to spin. My Papaw pulled up about this time in his new fancy, smancy Avalanche. But those slick street tires that are for looks, not heavy duty pulling weren't going to get that big truck out of the ditch. He tried for a minute or so, then quickly realized it was useless. Well, we thought Richie's truck might do it since he has after market tires, however it just wasn't quite heavy enough to pull it out either. Instead, one side of Kyle's truck buried even deeper-down to the frame! At this point, we realized Eric was probably going to have to come to try. He has one of those "play" trucks with big tires and no worries. But the only problem, he couldn't get a hold of him at first. So, I told Kyle he could use my Honda for the time-being if needed. However, Eric called about that time and was able to head over and help us out. It seemed like Eric's truck wasn't going to do the trick either...until he decided to leave some slack and just yank as hard as he could! And one loud POP later, the big diesel came flying out of the hole. The whole time, the other concern was whether or not the water line had burst or would burst with the truck on it and all of the spinning, and pulling, and tugging going on. And the bad part about that would've been that it's the holidays so no one is working!! But luckily, there was no damage to the water line. We estimate he was probably within 6 inches of it though!
Now, to Christmas Eve...it's that time of year again. The most anticipated evening. The night of the most awaited visitor! The kids are still stoked about Christmas and ready for Santa to come...it's Mom who can't sleep! :) I am afraid this could be the last year that they both believe. I am afraid the magic will start to dwindle from here. So, I plan to cherish every moment of tomorrow. Earlier we opened our Christmas PJ's. The kids got "footies" and were bouncing off of the walls with excitement. They thought they were SO cute!! And I have to admit, they look adorable in them!
We went to the annual Me-Me Christmas and Kylie again stole the show with her reaction to one of her presents. Actually it was the first thing she opened. She got a Hannah Montana wig and microphone and she started jumping up and down and cheering with excitement. She immediately had to put the wig on and begin to show off. She looked so funny and so cute!
Tomorrow will be my first year ever to cook Christmas breakfast for my family! I hope to make it a tradition. I am so excited about having my grandparents, parents, and my kiddos here Christmas morning. The menu is endless--eggs, bacon, biscuits, gravy, waffles, tomatoes (gotta have 'em with the gravy)....the list goes on! It'll be great.
It's the first Christmas out of the barn--I can't say I miss the barn. I have my big tree, decorations I haven't seen in 3 years, and plenty of room to have family over, so I have to say it's been a great holiday season.
But I am most thankful this year for just having the life that I have. Being happy. I don't need much--just love and a quaint place to lay my head. I am so thankful for 2 wonderful children that are full of life...and that are my life. And a fiance that is just sitting back and relishing his first Christmas in a family. I think he is truly enjoying the magic of the season.
Richie and I were talking earlier about the Christmas season and how it changes. He was remembering 15 years ago when he would open presents at his grandparents house. They have passed away now and their house is now the one he lives in. I remember my Auntie Karen being at Christmas. I remember Christmas at my Grandma Decker's house. They are all gone too, but it's like I told him--the season changes and our roles change too. Soon, Christmas will be at our house with our children and their children. But the meaning never changes and the magic is always there if you let it be.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!!!
It doesn't get much better than this.

Operation Clean House

Well, Operation Clean House is underway.....and my bathroom is sparkling! I just finished HAND MOPPING the floor--it was filthy! Now, on to my closet and room. I am gonna get this house under control! Kylie walked through the living room a minute ago and said, "Wow, it smells good in here." Not sure if that's good or not. Makes me think she's not used to the smell! But, I guess overall it's a good thing that someone noticed, huh?
We are SO ready for Christmas around here! But I do like the ability to get my kids motivated with the "I will start taking presents away" threat too!
Last night we went to the local park for a train ride through a lights display. It was a little short, but the kids liked it never the less. It's just fun to get out and enjoy the Christmas season and all of its displays!
Well, back to work--gotta get the house ready for Santa's visit! :)

Love and Sacrifice

I love reading as everyone knows and now that I am done with my Master's degree, I actually have time! I have been reading Karen Kingsbury's book, "Ever After" and a part of it really stuck out to me. There is a wedding that takes place in the story and the bride and groom exchanged vows that they had written. I loved the part in the vows that talked about love and sacrifice from 1 Corinthians 13. From there, my mind started racing with a ton of questions...

1) What is love? (Here's my favorite definition and it's from 1 Corinthians 13)
THE MEANING OF AGAPE

The Greek word that is used in 1 Corinthians 13 for love (agape), is a word that simply means "the ultimate act of self- sacrifice." It is a word which refers to the ultimate act of sacrificing oneself for the good of someone else. In fact, 1 Corinthians 13:1 could easily be translated the following way: "If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not a spirit of self-sacrifice, I am nothing."

2) Does love require sacrifice?

To me, absolutely. We can say we love something, but I think at that point the word "love" means something completely different if it doesn't involve the ability or desire to sacrifice oneself. I think that when someone can truly say they would be willing to sacrifice himself for the good or betterment of someone they love, then you know the love is agape love--unconditional, neverending, exceeding all limits.

Sacrificial love. It goes beyond beauty. Beyond brains or status. Beyond age.

The Countdown to Christmas

Well, just 2 more days of work this week and then I am officially off of work until 2008! I am ready for Christmas!
We went to see Alvin and the Chipmunks this weekend and it was SO cute! I loved it! It brought back tons of memories of when I was a kid. It was a little surreal to see my 7 year old and 5 year old sitting next to me enjoying the Chipmunks!

I had the weirdest dream last night. A storm was starting to form outside. It was rainy, windy, and dark. I walked outside to see the dust in front of the house swirling in the air. Then I looked out and saw a bunch of tiny tornadoes. I ran back into the house and told everyone there was a bad storm outside. Then I remember looking back outside again and saw a huge tornado forming and headed straight for the house. I was so scared! I called Richie (not sure where he was) and told him how scared I was. I was screaming into the phone. Then I went back into the house and found the kids and we grabbed the mattresses off the beds and ran down to the basement. No, we weren't at my house. We were in some huge mansion and there was a ton of my family there together. Then I woke up. So, I don't know if the tornado hit or not....but it was headed our way.
I tried to thinking of what the meaning of that dream could be--I felt like it meant that I was some place safe from harm and that my family and friends were there to support me through the storm. I think it's probably one of those dreams that is supposed to reassure me that I am in God's will and though there will be hard times and struggles in life, I always have those who love me nearby or just a phone call away.

Housewreck

My house is a horribly embarrassing disgusting wreck. Problem is I never have time to clean! I literally can't get the necessary items done before I find myself doing them all over again. Then, I never get to move on to the next level of cleaning. It's driving me nuts, but what do you do? Plus I really want to get organized. My office has turned into one big storage room of marketing supplies. Therefore, I know what I'll be doing on vacation next week....yep, you guessed it. Cleaning. Organizing.
I am ready for Christmas. I am ready for good food, presents, and a little down time! And I am ready to know what all of these surprises that Richie has bought me are....I am not good at waiting for surprises!!

Graduation Anticipation!

Next Saturday is my graduation! YIPPEE! The countdown begins--I am ready! But before I can graduate, I have such a busy and stressful week ahead....lots of work and typical week stuff to do! But that will make next weekend all the sweeter. My kids have a different countdown going--they are excited about next Friday because the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie comes out! (OK, I have to admit I am a little stoked too--I loved the Chipmunks as a kid!)
Kylie is also on a parade kick...we went to the local parade in town last week and then she went to the big parade in a nearby city. She loved it! It's awesome to see the magic in her eyes--what a wonderful age! She was so excited and would peek around the people next to us to see the parade coming down the road. It was the cutest thing. And don't worry, she worked the parade people with her charm and smile and got tons of candy! Her highlight was when Santa waved at HER! She thought that was just the greatest thing!
Well, I am done Christmas shopping, so if you didn't get a present from me yet, then you aren't getting one! And I am SO glad to be done this early. We ventured out Saturday to finish up and it was already a mad house at there! So, I am glad to know I don't have to fight the crowds.
Some friends of mine threw me a graduation party last weekend--it wasn't as a big of a hype as I would have liked though. It seemed like everyone was out of town or had plans. Such is December. Oh well. I did get to see an old friend from my last job and my good friend Amy made it as well. So, that was nice. However, gotta love when you mix water and wine. My new friends and my old friends just didn't seem to click. Guess it was the difference in "culture"! So, it was an opportunity to see how some people act when out of their element. Note taken.

3rd Time is a Charm

Well, we are State Champs once again--for the 3rd time be exact! The game wasn't nearly as nail-biting as last year's game, but it was definitely a good one. And it was much warmer than last year!
I am on a mission to get this house cleaned up--and I hope to accomplish it this weekend. I had a couple of picture taking requests, but to a lot of people's amazement, I said no! I am known for my ability to over extend myself, but I decided this weekend, that I wanted to rest and get some things done around my house.
A little holiday trivia for ya...learned this after a one-sided bet! :)

In the song, "Winter Wonderland", there is a phrase about Parson Brown...who (or what) is it referring to?

Answer: One can assume that "Parson" is used as a title, instead of a first name. In the period when this song was written, parsons (now known as a Protestant minister) often travelled among small rural towns to perform wedding ceremonies for denominational followers who did not have a local minister of their faith. Therefore, the children are most likely pretending that their snowman is a Parson with the surname "Brown," which would be visiting the town again in the future.

Love ya Richie!! :)

You Get What You Get and You Don't Throw a Fit!

Well, I have been busy working on everyone else's Christmas pictures and obviously haven't even bothered to snap a picture of the kids for my Christmas cards! So, last night as we were driving home, I told them to hurry in the house, change clothes, and meet me in the backyard--I was gonna get a picture no matter what! Of course, it's 5:15, the sun is going down, there is absolutely no background in the backyard except a barb wire fence, my big camera's battery was dead, and I had scrounged up 4 AA batteries that were on the edge of being gone just to get that picture. I haven't had a Christmas yet since I've had kids that I haven't sent out a card with their pictures on it....not gonna happen this year.
So, here's the result. Not the best, but guess what...you get what you get and you don't throw a fit!!
And in other exciting news--Houston Nutt is gone! Yeah! Now, who will we get? Let's hope we upgrade and not settle for someone!

Back to the Grind

Well, it never fails...a long weekend always comes to an end no matter how long it is! Hey, but I did get a few things accomplished this weekend! I have my tree assembled (looks like the Griswold tree on Christmas Vacation in my low-ceiling living room) and I got tons of Christmas shopping done! The kids are completely taken care of and now to just buy for those extremely difficult parents. I am ready for Christmas though...Richie and I watched some video of Christmas morning from '05 and '06 and it's still awesome to see how the kids really enjoy the magic of Christmas morning! I have such awesome kids!
I ventured out Friday morning for Black Friday...with the kids. Yes, it was dangerous considering the last time I went shopping on Black Friday. That was the day that I went off on the lady at Best Buy in 2002. Since then, I have avoided the stores on Black Friday knowing that I don't have the patience! But I decided I had had plenty of time to cool off (5 years), so I thought I would give it another shot. And it went awesome--the kids were such troopers. We were out of the house at 6:30 a.m. and didn't get home until after 5. I even had people compliment me on how well-behaved the kids were!
Well, I am turning in--the dog is asleep so I better catch up with him!

Swatting Mosquitos

It's that time of year--everyone is wanting the perfect family picture for the Christmas card! However, in the 3 years I have taken pictures, I have never had to swat mosquitos while snapping the perfect fall pose. But, last weekend, I got so many mosquito bites! What a nuisance! I have been nursing my bites with anti-itch cream to keep from scratching! I guess I should just prepare myself the next time I go out and carry bug spray!! :)

I am so glad this was a short week--I think I crammed a week's worth of doing in it though...I am ready for tonight--relax and hang out. I love my kids, but I am sure ready for a night off--I haven't had a weekend off in a month, so I am ready for some peace and quiet. I think I will try and get some Christmas shopping done this weekend while they are gone.
They are gonna be home with me this Friday during the day, so I am taking them to see the Bee Movie also.....it's just nice to have some time off work and not be going somewhere. I hope to get some things accomplished (I always say this when I have a few days off and I accomplish absolutely nothing, so don't expect big things!).

Peeping Tom

I went out to my car the other night to get some things and when I got to the back door I about jumped out of my skin! There he was, just staring in trying to catch a peek at us! Ok, so he's a frog, but still, it was scary! And funny--he looks like he waved when I took the picture! Just proof that voyeurism crosses animal boundaries!

Go Kylie!

Kylie's cheer competition was last Saturday--again, I am late w/a post because I really wanted a picture on here with it. Anyway, they placed 5th out of 6th--and we were thrilled! This is their first competition and they were actually competing in the youth league--10 and 11 year olds! So, for a squad that's made up of mostly 5-7 year olds, beating ANYBODY was a thrill! I learned so much at this competition--these girls wear hair extensions, tons of makeup and they come to win! So, I bought Kylie a fake ponytail and the Moms are trying to scrounge up the glitter make-up and star stickers so that our girls stand a chance!

Meet Opie!

Ok, I have slacked on the blogging, but it's because I have been wanting to include pictures and haven't had the time to put them on my computer! So, here's my solution--tons of posts each with a picture! First up, Mr. Opie. Isn't he precious? He's an Italian Greyhound (and a very well-dressed one may I add) and right now he's probably 10 weeks old. He's feisty and cuddly all in one. We're still fighting on the potty training, but he's smart, so hopefully he gets it soon!

Glad to Be Home

Well, I made it back from Dallas....I am so glad. I wasn't ready for this trip mentally, so I am glad to be back. We did have an awesome time though--I have such a good job! Our first night was spent in Texas Stadium playing flag football. We even got to tour the Cowboys locker room. I got my picture made in front of T.O.'s locker, Tony Romo, and Ken Hamlin. It was awesome to be standing out on the field looking up at the seats--the exact opposite view of what we normally get! Then, the next night we had our dine-arounds. This is where our district goes to dinner together at a nice restaurant. The philosphy here is completely different that my other company....our ticket for the 10 of us was $1513! Our company prides itself on really taking care of its employees and treating them well. I also won $20 in Starbucks gift cards! Probably the highlight of the meeting though was that I was asked to lead our team building activities--something I have such a passion for and really enjoy. Well, after we did the activities in our district, word got out to the rest of the managers in the region (3 state area) and they want me to send them the information on the activities--they were that impressed with them! What a compliment!!
Tonight is Kylie's dress rehearsal for her cheerleading competition. She is excited to get to wear her entire uniform for practice!
Today, Opie gets to go and visit Weston's classroom. When his teacher heard about his new puppy, she wanted to see him and let the kids see him. So, I am going to dress him in his Polo shirt and let him visit the kids!
Better get ready for work!

Much Better Weekend

I must say I enjoyed this weekend much better than the last one--we had our "Thanksgiving meal" on Saturday since everyone is so busy on the holiday, it was Richie's birthday, and Opie is here!
First, Richie's birthday--he got tons of great presents and I think he had a good birthday. The Razorbacks won on his birthday (thanks to the return of the mascot!!)! And beyond that, we ate a big meal and just hung out.
Secondly, I got to bring Opie home on Thursday....he just as sweet as can be. He sleeps wonderfully (wish my kids would've done that as babies), but we are gonna have to get more practice on the potty training. He isn't doing horribly--in fact when he's in his cage, he does great. But he needs a little guidance in the rest of the house when he's free. But he is definitely a baby still, so hopefully he'll catch on soon. He was hilarious this morning. He got up around 6 and I put him in his cage to eat. Well, he was mad at me for not holding him (he wants to be near me constantly). I told him to eat and potty, then he could come back out. Well, he ate his food, but the whole time he was just talking (probably back-talking!) the whole time. It was SO funny! You could tell he was so mad at me! But he ate, went potty, and now he's curled up under a blankie in Kylie's lap. He is SO cold natured--just like me! Anyway, I got some great pics that I will post ASAP.
Tomorrow I leave for Dallas for a few days for work. I don't want to go! I have so much to do around here, I still have a ton of prep work for the trip, and I haven't begun to pack. Oh well, I better get busy. Guess that extra hour I have today will come in handy!

Happy Halloween!

Well, the kids had such a busy and fun day yesterday for Halloween! I went to each of their class parties and they played tons of games, ate a pound of candy and enjoyed the free time. Then, afterschool we went home and got ready for trick-or-treating. Weston dressed up as "Rocky Balboa" and Kylie took her witch costume that my Mom got her (which was a prissy, diva witch) and decided to wear green and black face make-up with it! It was so funny--she has such a spin on life! We then went and played games at the town carnival and visited a few family members.
And today, Opie gets to come home. I am going to get him after work. I am excited, but I am not sure if I am ready for the no sleep for a few nights. Luckily, I only have to make it through tomorrow, then there's the weekend.
Richie's birthday is this weekend. Kylie and I were talking about it this morning and she asked how old he was going to be. I told her and she said, "He just needs to go on up to heaven then." I about fell over laughing!

I need some sugar!

Ok, kisses would be good too, but I am talking about REAL sugar! I talk all day long about diabetes and high blood sugar with doctors, nurses, and office staff. Well, today I went and had a fasting blood glucose test administered at a conference I attended. I knew that when I get hungry, I probably have a slight dip in my blood sugar, however my test came back at 55!! That is way low! The ladies at my table were getting me orange juice and granola bars and fearing I might pass out. I texted Richie my result and he asked a friend of his who has Type 1 diabetes about my result. He was shocked too and said I probably should have some lab work done. Well, I have connections and so today when I visited my endocrinologists office, I asked him what he thought. He wasn't too alarmed, but indicated I was probably hypoglycemic since I have symptoms with my low results. He suggested I buy a home monitor and start keeping a "sugar journal" to understand my reaction to food/lack of food. But the good news is that he didn't necessarily feel that I had any sort of serious health condition beyond hypoglycemia. So, I guess I'll prick a finger or two and see what I do over the next few weeks.
I am taking the day off tomorrow so that I can go to my kids Halloween parties. I love my job--3 weeks of vacation and a flexible schedule has allowed me to feel like a Mommy again! Then, after school it's costume time and trick-or-treating. I'll try to post some pictures of my little Evander Holyfield and Wicked Witch!
Only a couple more days until I get to bring my puppy home--I am excited (but I am also trying to store up on my sleep)! I bought him a Polo shirt, a fleece jacket, and a cute little winer t-shirt. He's gonna be so cute!!

We Have 3 Bathrooms!

Kylie came home last night from cheerleading practice completely worn out. The poor girl had been practicing for 3 hours and since competition is quickly approaching, they have been practicing longer and harder. Well, she went straight to her room and fell asleep shortly afterward. I debated as to whether I should let her sleep or not. It was about 5:30 and since she typically goes to bed at 7:30 (and still fights getting up in the morning), I thought I would let her sleep. Well, she decides to get up at 7:00. She was groggy and cranky. She walked through the living room to my bedroom, then came back out. A few minutes later, she was sitting in a bar stool at the island trying to hold her eyes open. I went over to her and gave her a kiss....that's when I realized I was standing in something wet. A lot of wet. I looked down and thought one of the kids had spilled a drink. That's when Weston explained to me what happened....Kylie had peed in the floor! He said she just pulled her pants down and wet to the bathroom right there in the kitchen! The poor girl was so out of it that she had confused the pantry in the kitchen with the bathroom.

The Weekend is Over!

Have you ever wanted a weekend to end? That's the way I felt about this one. It's finally over--it's Sunday afternoon, I have a couple of hours before the kids get home and I can put the weekend behind me and get ready for the week. Don't get me wrong, I am not looking forward to the week--it's gonna be a real busy one. My boss will be here Thursday to do my monthly ride-a-long, I have some preparations to make for my Dallas meeting next week, and Kylie has a ton of practices since her competition is fastly approaching. No, I am just glad the weekend is over.
You see, I was prepared for the weekend. I made some plans, spent some money and had it together. But others didn't. And it went downhill from there. I found myself thinking, "I should've done the complete opposite this weekend from what I did. I shouldn't have spent money, I shouldn't have wasted my day Saturday, I should've dressed up instead of down." But's it over.
I guess I spent too much time second-guessing my actions, wanting them to be perfect. Then, I spent the rest of my time regretting them, wishing I could've done it differently. But I know why I worried about the weekend. My thoughts were focused on the past, when I should've been enjoying the present. But it's hard. You want to leave the past in the past, but what happens when it shows up at every social function in the present? How do you get "past" it? I feel like a snob, yet I feel out of place. I want to immerse myself, but then I find myself gasping for air. I just long for some separation between the past and the present.
Now, I want my weekend back so I can do it over again.
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On a lighter note, here's a pic of Richie and me at a friend's wedding. Don't we look just fabulous? :)

A New Man for Me

Well, I am getting a new man. Yes, that's right. His name is Opie. He has beautiful blue/grey eyes, he loves to cuddle, and he stole my heart. The little Italian Greyhound is getting a new home. I can't wait! He is absolutely precious! I think this is a great dog for me. They don't like to potty outside, so I can litter box train him (hence the cat similarity). They also don't like the cold weather, so he'll love clothes! I have already bought him a new shirt and found some flannel PJ's for him too. He's supposed to get to come home around Halloween, so I probably won't get to buy him a costume, but that's OK. Of course, I have to go out of town the 5-7 of November, so Richie will be dog-sitting for me. Anyway, I can hardly wait!
Some friends of ours are getting married this weekend. Of course, the "traditional" bachelor/bachelorette parties took place last weekend. However, Richie and I were the smart ones of the group--we didn't go. And it's a good thing because evidently the "traditional" fights took place the next morning! It's so nice to have a guy who respects me and understands my feelings--thanks Richie! :)

Wormy Dog Saloon

Ok, I really want a puppy. However, I have learned a valuable lesson in the past few days. So, I had my eyes set on an Italian Greyhound puppy, but I read up on the breed and thought that maybe it wasn't the dog for me. The information said that the breed is for cat lovers and I am definitely a dog person. So, I started looking around at other breeds and found the Shorkie. They are absolutely adorable! If you get the Yorkie coloring with the Shih-Tzu style of hair, then you have a Ewok imitator!! So, I found one in the local newspaper and got so excited. The dogs are personable and really cute. So I called the guy and made arrangements to go look at it. Well, we didn't get there until late--around 7:30 pm. It was already getting dark and I didn't get a good look at the puppy. But he was spunky and had the coloring that I loved. So, I decided to get him. Well, we brought him home and he just followed me everywhere I went--such a cutie. Then, he curled up on the couch on Richie's chest. Well, as he was getting settled, he noticed a worm coming out his rear...YUCK. However, it was just one. So, I said I would take him immediately to the vet tomorrow to get him wormed. No worries. Well, it went downhill from there. We noticed another...and another. So we went into the kitchen on the linoleum and checked him out. Well, at that moment like 8 or 10 came out and fell on the floor. I about lost it!!! That is more than I can handle. I told Richie that the puppy had to go back! So, at 10:30 we called the guy and told him the situation. He agreed to let us bring back the puppy (well there wasn't really an option). Needless to say I got in bed at 1 a.m. that morning!
So, I learned a lot that night. KNOW the breeder, SEE the location where the puppy is living, MEET the parents of the puppy, and MAKE SURE IT HAS BEEN WORMED!!
Tomorrow we are going to see the little grey Italian greyhound tomorrow again. We have already seen where they live, met the Mom, and the lady who has them. The place is immaculate...the puppies are healthy and happy. She even said we can't have the puppy for a week or so until she can give it the last round of medications!! That's just her rules before she lets the puppies go. I learned that good things (and wormless dogs) come to those who wait!!

That makes me want to puke!

So today I am home...sick. Read the title--you get the picture. I DO NOT have time for this. I have so much to do with work and home and sitting on the couch and occasionally kissing the throne isn't my idea of accomplishing things!
So still no decisions have been permanently made on the housing. I think buying my parents' property from them is probably not the best decision since it would only add to newlywed stress. But what do I do? I can probably stay in the modular until the house sells, but it is a buyer's market right now, so it could be quick! Guess I will just pray and hope for the best!

Dilemma

I swear I should submit my life to the plot writers for soap operas. It seems that just when I get settled, someone decides to keep things fresh and switch them up on me. My parents are moving--they have bought a beautiful new home that used to be owned by a doctor. It makes sense for them--my Dad just can't handle the land by himself since his heart attack. But that means I have some decisions to make....do I sell my land too? Do I move out of the modular? I have no clue what the best idea is. Part of me has the answer, then I change my mind. I guess it just surprised me--completely caught me off guard. I JUST got settled in my new home. Oh well, I guess I need drama huh? Good grief...I am just ready to have a home and get comfy. So, now to figure out where my new digs will be. I feel like I have to change my plans and dreams, or do I? I really want my beach wedding, but now I think my money would be well spent toward a new home. I don't know. Damn parents.

So I was watching Rules of Engagement and I just got ticked. I am such a woman because I cannot understand the purpose of lying to your spouse and sneaking off to a strip club...sorry, but I just think it's a 1/2 step away from cheating (and it is when the girl gets off her pole)....I don't understand why we can't be satisfied with what we have. What is it that makes a person get up from the chair in their home next to their beautiful wife and drive down to the titty bar? I honestly think if the tables were turned and there were dick bars, things would be different. But, women don't think that way....we are wired completely different.

It's Friday!

It's Friday! Woo Hoo! Not that I mind working though--my office is now a sleek 2008 Dodge Charger! SWEET! I love it! It's tons better looking than than 'ol blue! I am gonna have to keep it clean though! Black shows everything!! However, it has this glitter paint on it that helps mask road dust. I had so much fun zipping my way to Mt. Ida today in my new car. I have begun deer widow season. It's Friday night and I am sprawled out on the couch catching up on Grey's Anatomy...that's OK though. I really need to get caught up on a few things. I have some office work to do, the house is a wreck, and I need to get some goody bags ready for my clients next week. So, I will try and use my time wisely....ok, I will probably sneak in an episode of Girls Next Door! We had our pictures yesterday--Kylie is SUCH a ham! I know her pictures will be cute. And Weston had some great smiles too--thank goodness because their school pictures are horrible--they both look like toothless old men!

CHARGE!!!

Tomorrow is the BIG day--the hearse is dead! I get my new car and I can't wait! I am ready to finally have a cool car that I spend my day in! :) I'll be sure and attach a pic when I get it!
So there's this puppy I have my eyes on...I know, I know--I am a busy girl and I have a new home. BUT he's so cute. I really want him, but I don't know if it's practical or not. Plus, I gotta make sure he'll get along with Andy when he moves in. So, I guess I need to give it some deep thought.
Tomorrow is picture day at an awesome local photographer--I am nervous! I want great pictures! I have waited and waited to book with this lady until I had a house that was suitable for hanging them. I have picked out some cute outfits for the kids and now I need to just pray I don't have a zit pop up and that the kids cooperate!

Big Fun

Well, our weekend led us to Big Cedar with my work team and we had such a great time! The company provides a yearly "retreat" with the members of the district. You have a little social time with the group and then the rest of the trip is R & R for you and a guest! I love my job! We went to Dogwood Canyon on Saturday and did a tour of the Canyon and it was beautiful!! The kids went with us and had a great time. We stayed in a log cabin and sat out on the deck and looked out over the lake at night and just enjoyed our time away from the busy home life. Sunday was a blast when we went downtown and rode go-carts. Kylie said the go-carts were the "funnest ride she's ever been on"!
Also, I should be getting my new company car any day--a black 2008 Charger! I am SOOO ready to retire the hearse!

Beautiful Disaster

So, yesterday was one sweet mess after another. I won't get deep with the initial details, it was just a "de ja vu" sort of day--let's just say I am not keen about reliving past problems. So, by the end of the day, I was beat. I just get tired of people--meddling people, rude people, and those who think judgementalism gets them somewhere. Why can't we all just get along? Then I get to worrying what's wrong with me? I know my handicap with people--I am a person who is confident in her opinions and feelings. I am not fake. I don't kiss butt and I don't put up with crap. So, that sort of limits me at times. But I won't compromise me. I hate to think that because I don't roll over for others that I am a bad person. I have a small pool of the greatest best friends in the world. I have learned that I am the type that has a few very close friends. Others I am acquaintances with....that's it. So, to Amy W.--you are a jewel. You get me. Why? Because we are SO alike!! It's nice to know that there is no crap in our friendship. I love your candidness, your listening skills, and that you believe in me!! To Richie, it's a blessing to have a man that's got my back. You don't take crap either and for that I admire you. It's so nice to be able to cry on your shoulder and feel you kiss me on the head and say that it's going to be OK. It's sweet to hear you say that even if it's just me and you, that's all you need.
It's those that I am the most alike that I most bond with. I have learned as I age that you can't win them all, so you enjoy the ones that are true.
So, here's how the day ended....we were at Weston's ballgame and I was down. The guys lost the game, the day had been rough, and as we got up to leave, I walked down the bleachers. I made it to the last one and BAM! I feel flat on my rear! I think I would've been more embarrassed if I had been more with it. But instead, my mind was in a fog, so I just got up and walked on. I didn't even care if the whole world saw me! Luckily another Mom was sitting there and she caught me on the way down.
I was ready to go to bed last night when it was time!

Of Mice and (Wo)Men

Ok, I love my new house--but the uninvited guests have gotta go! I HATE mice! But when you live smack dab in a pasture, well you get lots of "field" mice. So, I have these glue traps set out to catch them. I hate the sound of the SNAP! old-timey mousetraps, but I think I might hate the squeal of a stuck mouse even worse.
I took the day off today and was standing in my kitchen when I hear "EEE! EEE! EEE!" coming from my laundry room. ICK-a mouse! I am petrified of them being in the house. I just hate the thought of something having the run of the house and catch stand them!
So, I call Richie, but it was about 1:30 and he wasn't going to be off work for a few more hours. Well, I couldn't stand the noise, plus I couldn't leave my house or go outside because I have to go through my laundry room to get to my car. So, I called my Papaw to see if he was out and about and would be willing to kill him. Luckily they were on their way to town and came by to get it.
By the way, called the pest company and made an appointment for first thing Monday morning to spread some poison. It's me or them and since I pay the bills, they gotta go!!

Ok, so I am chasing mice, but that's all I am chasing right now. Rumors and old friends are not on my list. I find it humorous that old colleagues won't talk to me, but I don't let it bother me. I am not interested in someone else's selfish perspective. I don't have a beef with their life or issues that they are currently experiencing against their wishes. My life is just that-all mine. I couldn't be happier right now! AWESOME job, AWESOME fiance, and an AWESOME house with lots of mice! Who could ask for more??

Little Rock

Guess what? I am engaged! Yes, engaged. So, you ask--who is the lucky guy and why haven't we heard about him? Richie is his name--no, you haven't heard about him on my blog yet. Not because he was a secret from the world--we've been together for awhile, but because I wanted some parts of my life to remain intimate, unknown. But, in the process it appears as if I have been hiding a part of my life. So, I starting today, I am gonna include that aspect of my life in my blog.
Ok, on with the engagement. Totally romantic! I am sucker for someone who puts thought into a romantic event! So, last Sunday, was the big day. We had spent the last two weeks frantically working on my house--painting, cleaning, and hanging pictures and curtains to get ready for game day--Razorback game day that is! After all of the work, we were exhausted. So, Sunday he suggests that we "go somewhere". I was all for it--I had seen enough angles of my house to make me want to run! We headed out to the Nature Center first and walked along the paths outside. Then, I suggested that we go to Mt. Magazine to check out the new lodge. When we got there, we stopped at the hang gliding ledge. There was a guy that was about to glide, so we decided to check out the lodge and then come back and watch him take off. When we got to the lodge, we went and sat out on a large rock overlooking the valley. We sat there and just talked and hung out. Then he said, "Well, we better get going." We don't want to be late." We stood up and hugged and enjoyed one more last view of the valley. Then, he started talking and honestly it gets blurry from here. I just remember hearing "best friend" and "the rest of my life" and that was enough to let me know what was going on. He got down on his knee and proposed. I started bawling! I couldn't even talk! I was so surprised and so excited. Oh, and when I was able to talk--I said yes! We plan on wedding next April--I really want a beach wedding, so I think we are going to wait on the weather and head south! Anyway, I am thrilled!

Stripped

I am cutting back on some things in my life. School is done for me, but now my kids are knee deep in homework. So, my life has to be simplified--I need to change my focus. Sure, it's hard.
I have found myself really tired again--it's actually a welcomed thing though. I feel like I have relaxed in order to feel that way. Sure, I'm stressed right now, but I think there's a peace about me that comes from knowing I have to let go of some things. I have to kick the "I can handle it all" attitude. I find that I am not as strong as people think I am--I am so weak. So imperfect. But in the same respect it doesn't seem as if transparency has gotten me anywhere lately either. I find that exposing myself to be honest and open has only caused more problems. It just doesn't make you want to put yourself out there...only to get hurt.

Opposites Attract

Well, I thought Weston would be my shining star when school started back and I figured I would have a permanent seat at the Principal's office for Kylie--but no! Kylie has been an angel since school has started and has gotten ALL green notes. Definitely a record for her. Weston has gotten all green notes too, however he has brought home 3 F's in the last two days! Nothing like him whatsoever. He is such a smart kid, but something's not clicking for him. I know it's not the teacher--he's had her before. So, I just have to assume that he's just not into school this year.
As for fall baseball, the team is showing signs of life. They won a game this evening! Weston made contact with every ball and although he was thrown out, he was helping to get runners in.
Well, the Ambien is setting in, so I guess it's time to shut the computer and get some shut eye.

Mastered

Well, I have completed my Master's degree....I am thrilled! This past Thursday night is when it hit me. I was sitting on the couch, it was 7:30 or so and I was at home. No books to read this week, no papers to write. Hey, maybe I'll have time to blog again!
Kylie has started cheerleading class w/gymnastics mixed in. She is awesome! She's a natural entertainer who has the drive to learn. She also started kindergarten--that was hard for me! I walked them to the bus stop and anyone who knows Kylie knows she isn't scared of anything. Well, when she saw the big bus rounding the corner, she grabbed her brother's hand. She didn't say a word, just grabbed a hold of his hand and watched it come to a stop. I cried. Then, Weston was sweet to her and on the way home he told her where to sit and that he would be in the back of the bus and not to worry that he was there.
Well, I am going to get a nap in before her practice is over....that's all for now!

I am pathetic...

Nearly a whole month without a post? Plain awful! I guess I have a few excuses though....I finally moved! WOOHOO! Ok, now back to reality--the place is filthy (former owners were probably pigs). So, in order to put ANYTHING away, I have to scrub, yes scrub the cabinet! So, it is snail speed on the getting settled aspect. But, hey--there is a door on my bedroom.
Ok, also, my life is complete--I shook FAITH HILL AND TIM MCGRAW'S HANDS--TWICE!!!! Went to see them again in concert and it was AWESOME! I had such a blast. (No I wasn't at the Lafayette one!!)
Well, Kylie starts kindergarten in 1 1/2 weeks. I am so nervous...for her teacher. And Weston got the same teacher he had for kindergarten--he loves her so we were thrilled!!